Affirmations

I had lunch with my soul sister today and we were talking about going for classes where people tell us things that we already know but crack the whip on us so that we start doing it. And she did just that to me today, she said that I should start talking to my babies. As weird as it sounds I haven't really consciously spoken to them. Hubby speaks to them all the time but I guess I have taken it for granted that they're in there so for sure they'll know what I'm thinking about. The first mistake a mother can make is assuming that your child knows what you're thinking about.

So after lunch I started thinking about what to say to these little guys and I think it'll be easier to pen them down and when I forget I'll come back and read it here and if I have more I'll just keep adding on. 

If you're expecting or have a baby please feel free to use these affirmations for your little ones. You have no idea how well your baby understands you...

You are kind, you are smart, you are important. 

(Stolen from The Help but so beautiful no?)

You're fearless and confident!

Always remember to be polite. 

Be compassionate. Respect your elders.

You won't be fussy, you will be funny!

When in doubt smile!

Don't yell, ask nicely.

We're going to have lots of fun!

Constant Cravings

Everyone who knows me knows that I really don't like sweets. I remember my sister saying, "What's wrong with you? Who doesn't like ice cream?" I just don't like anything sweet, creamy and cold. I don't eat cold fruits because it hurts my teeth. I normally only drink hot drinks like tea or coffee, always black no sugar or milk.

Now that I'm pregnant the first thing everyone asks me is if I have any cravings. I've always thought that when you get pregnant you start craving for weird things like pickles on ice cream or the smell of petrol, so I keep telling people, "No, not really craving anything."

But the thing is that my taste buds have turned 180 degrees and I now eat things that I never really liked before. I now love chocolate cakes and butter cakes and even ice cream. I only drink ice cold water or Sunkist mango cordial. The more ice the better. I'm really into coconut milk desserts like the Thai Red Ruby or Cendol.

I can't stand food with too much onions or garlic because it leaves a taste in my mouth all day and the taste makes me sick. I'm always carrying a packet of Wild Cherry Hudsons and pop a sweet into my mouth almost every half an hour.

It's really strange. I've never been much of a lady's finger fan but now I love the vegetable with plain white rice. I've always been a huge chicken fan but now I can't eat any chicken, so fish has been my only meat source. I never liked tomatoes but now I always ask for extra tomatoes in my salads.

It's so funny how the body works. I've never had a problem with my appetite before, well, until now. I don't seem to want to eat anything. I find eating such a chore and I really hate getting up everyday and thinking about what to eat because almost everything makes me sick. I was in a huge Japanese food craze at one point but I think I overdid the unagi and cod teriyaki so I am back to square one and have no idea what to try out next.

Oh and I hate my kitchen! I absolutely can't even imagine cooking in it, which is so weird because the kitchen used to be my most favourite place in the house!

Shopping for Doctors is not as fun as Shopping for Clothes!

I decided that I needed to shop around for a doctor who can deliver my twins vaginally because not many of the 'younger' doctors do it. I'm guessing it's easier for them, they get to schedule it, they're in and out in an hour or 2 tops and they don't need to wait around while you labour. While I understand that if there are complications and if the twins are not co-operating with mommy and are in difficult positions to come out through the natural passage then I understand that I'll have to undergo a c-section due to the circumstances. However, I do not understand doctors who say that they exclusively perform c-sections for women who have more than one baby regardless of their positions or not.

Again, I don't really have many friends who have had twins and all of them have had amazing births, some gave birth in their bathtub at home, some had an epidural, some had an emergency c-section and some used hypnobirthing techniques and swore by it. So I was very confused when my present obgyn told me that she is more comfortable performing a c-section on me.

Now I am not being stubborn, I just feel that it's my body and it's my right to choose how I want my babies to be born. I would like to have the peace of mind knowing that my doctor did everything she could before deciding to go with the c-section. Plus, I'd like to be as mobile as I can after delivery because I have not one but 2 babies to feed, change, bathe, etc. Now this is where you may think I'm trying to kill myself but I do not want a live-in maid as well.

So started the shopping for an obgyn who could deliver my precious little ones. Oh, and another reason for looking for a new obgyn was that we needed a hospital closer to home. Sunway is quite a distance for me to labour all the way in the car!

I met up with Dr Ashar in Ampang Puteri, Dr Jean Woo in Gleneagles and Dr Paul Tay at Prince Court Medical Centre. Dr Ashar and Dr Jean Woo were wonderful, they patiently answered all my questions, calmly explained the techniques they'd be using to deliver the twins as if I was a doctor myself (I really appreciate when doctors do this, I hate it when doctors talk to me as if I don't understand anything because I'm not a doctor. I mean hello, we have google!) and they comforted me and told me I had nothing to worry about with twins. Many twins have been delivered naturally if the twins were in the right positions.

The came Dr Paul Tay who was a complete dick! Forgive my french but I left Prince fuming mad because of his bedside manner or lack thereof! First and foremost, he was typing all of our notes into his computer, which meant he hardly looked at us when he spoke to us (this is a huge pet peeve of mine! I mean we are paying you for your time and service, the least you could do is look at us in the eye and talk to us, this is our babies we're discussing!), secondly, rather than understanding that the whole reason I came was to discuss whether I could deliver vaginally or not he kept pushing for a c-section, saying that his tolerance was very low and at the slightest complication he would do the c-section, and thirdly he kept bringing up numbers, which started to make me feel like he felt like we couldn't afford it. Hello! We came to Prince fully aware of the costs, IDOIT! And he said if I deliver in May (why would he want to jinx me like that!??!!) we'd have to probably pay about RM 30,000 per baby so if we don't have that kind of budget to not even bother coming to Prince if my water breaks early and to go straight to a government hospital and deliver because transfers are tough! Urrrgh...my blood is boiling just typing this.

I was so upset when I left Prince, first and foremost at least practice some tact, don't have to be so money oriented, at the end of the day we want our babies to be delivered safely to the best hands we see fit. We don't care about the money, but also be comforting towards the mother, don't talk to me as if I'm some roast turkey you just can't wait to carve.

I was so disappointed that we won't be delivering at Prince, the rooms are so purty!

Disclaimer: I have nothing against caesarean births but I believe that every woman has the right to decide how she would like to give birth. She owns every right to decline or refuse whatever she is not comfortable with. We need to change this mindset that doctors know everything and we have no say. My advise to future mommies out there is to read up as much as you can and meet up with as many doctors as you want before making a decision. Birth is no joke and there is never one way of doing something.