Postpartum Body That Nobody Warned Me About

Published on makchic.com on Oct 2013

Three weeks postpartum, hubby and I made a quick trip out to buy some provisions. We bumped into an acquaintance of his and I was asked the most horrific question, “So how far along are you?” Fine, I understand you still look pregnant after giving birth but we all know how painful it is when people think you’re still pregnant. I spent the whole ride back home feeling pretty shitty to be honest. I’ve just had twins, so I know it takes time, but just how long would it take to get back to my pre-baby weight? Will I ever be able to fit into my old jeans?

It’s been a depressing postpartum because I loved my pregnant body. I wore the tightest tops and dresses to show off my bump. Nothing jiggled or folded when I sat down. I embraced every curve and enjoyed the pregnancy glow. Now, nothing fits and I can’t get my pants past my calves.

It doesn’t help that friends, who have given birth a minimum of seven months ago, look even better now compared to their pre-pregnancy days. As much as I keep telling myself to stop comparing myself to them and that everyone has a different metabolic rate, I’m only human. I wince every time my makcik urut comes over to wrap me up in the traditional bengkung (body wrap), but at the same time, I tell her to make it tighter, as uncomfortable as it may be. I wear it for 15 hours and eagerly unwrap myself like a gift on Christmas morning to see the progress of my shrinking tummy.

The slow rate of losing weight can get pretty frustrating. Scrutinising yourself in the mirror everyday for six months can drive you insane, which is why I don’t own a weighing scale because if I go up even a decimal point, I’ll fly into a rage. It isn’t a very healthy thing to do every morning.

Another thing I absolutely cannot stand is looking at celebrity mothers who have just given birth but appear back to normal in six to eight weeks postpartum. Some celebrity mothers even look better than I do at seven months into their pregnancy. Depressing then becomes an understatement. I’m ever so gently reminded by my loved ones that I had twins, but didn’t Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Lopez have twins too?

I still remember people telling me how fast the weight will melt off because I’ll be breastfeeding twins. I was excited at the prospect of being skinny but I failed to read the fine print. What exactly does ‘fast’ mean? Someone told me six months and another nine. So is nine months supposed to be fast? How did Kate Middleton fit into her Jenny Packham dress a mere eight weeks after giving birth? Is losing weight via breastfeeding a myth?

It’s been almost two months now and just the other day I looked at my babies when it clicked: it’s wonderful to be a woman. My magical body created and nurtured these two little human beings. How can I expect my body to go back to its original shape so quickly when it went through a series of changes for nine months?

We hardly see photographs of brand new mothers and now I know why. It’s not so much because we don’t look that great right after birth, but it’s because we’re so busy getting used to becoming a mother. And about six months in, when we’ve finally gotten into the groove of things, we start hanging out with friends again and are finally OK with other people taking photographs of us because by then we usually start to resemble like how we used to.

So to all you pregnant and new mothers out there, don’t expect to look like Victoria Beckham or Kate Middleton right away because it takes time. Try not to obsess about what you see on the weighing scale. Focus on getting back your health first because you have to take care of another human being and that itself takes a lot of energy. As to how much time does it take to lose the weight, I still don’t know because I have a long way to go myself but I remain hopeful.